London Public Transport...

Well, since Marc decided to write an entry on Taiwan's public transportation, I thought it only fitting to do the same on the London transport system (btw, his blog is quite good if you wish to live vicariously through others... take a look!).

Last night, LSE organized a disco dance on a boat on the Thames. Great fun but the pier was next to London Tower close to the financial district (i.e. the area is completely dead after 9:00 PM). Only problem was the event ended past midnight which meant the Tube was not operating (it closes at midnight). We had to grab a night bus to get back (given the 1h30 walk back to Rosebery Avenue). Taking the bus in London is quite the adventure (you know, the double decker buses...). First, you need to learn how to flag one down. Putting your arm out does not stop them. You literally need to fling your body in front of the moving bus and... make sure you jump out of its way as it comes to a stop. Then, you have to figure out if you can buy the tickets inside the bus or at the bus station. Some buses will not allow you to buy them on the bus which makes the passengers life a little more difficult.

Night buses are quite interesting. They almost grind to a halt as we near piccadilly circus as we waited close to 30 minutes to traverse less than 500 yards. Fights commonly erupt on night buses (as we witnessed) and drunken behaviour is quite common (especially when returning home late).

A little about London bus etiquette:
1) ALWAYS enter the bus by the front door. DO NOT jump the queue. Show your ticket to the bus driver (or else he will literally not move until everyone does... This asshole bus driver stopped the bus in the middle of rush hour traffic until everyone had gotten out of the bus and shown their tickets... again just to make sure we had paid the fair.
2) NEVER stand on the second floor of a double-decker bus. It's unsafe, rude and worst of all, the bus driver will stop the bus until everyone is sitting.
3) When taking an older double decker bus (i.e. older than Canada), make sure you listen to the ticket attendant (older busses have a bus driver and an attendant given the bus driver needs all the attention on the bus as this pile of junk will probably breakdown if he doesn't give it his undivided attention...). Do not go upstairs to the second deck until the ticket attendant allows you too... or else, the bus will stop until you come back down.
4) Oh, and never, never, under any pretense (did I say never?) grab the entrance pole at the back of the bus. This is for the ticket attendant. Yes, the bus will stop until you stop touching the magical pole.

We took a fairly old double decker this morning and the ticket attendant was hilarious. It was like a skit out of Monty Python, everything down to the guy's bad teeth (bad breath), thick glasses, rude comments but genuine kindness. Some memorable quotes from our 30 minute ride:
"Where do you think you're going (to Latin American tourist not understanding how the bus system worked)"
"Get Down from there! Now! " (to unknowing Canadian... me... having just gone up to the second floor without his permission)
"Don't leave (pretty African women)"
"Please sit down so I can sit on your lap (pretty French women)"

And on and on. As we left, we passed buckingham palace... he looks at me and says "wave to my mommy...". Really funny stuff :)

Oh... I got to see some dinosaurs today at the Natural History Museum next to Harrod's and Hyde Park... Great stuff!